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Written by: Raymond Fohjem

How to choose a partner between two lovers

How to make the right choice

Do you know that one of the problems faced by almost 65% of couples during their early days happens to be with the problem of choice of partner? It's no wonder why out of a hundred percent, only about 38% of marriages managed to survived.

In most cases, this happens as a result of wrong choices of relationship/marriage partners. It's no wonder why the divorce courts are usually busy terminating certificates and contracts of people who thought were in love; but the reverse

During most of my Coaching sessions, I happened to met many divorced people. Most of their divorce happened to be coming either from them or their partners and just very few from external forces. From what I usually gather, the whole thing boils down as a result of wrong choices of partners and the end result happens to be nothing but split-ups.

It's for this reason, that I decided to come up with this article in order for you not to fall in the hands of the wrong person.

How to choose a partner between two lovers

Below are some of the things to consider on how to choose a partner between two lovers. By having a better mastery of them, you stand a better chance of building a healthy relationship. All you have to do is to be rating the points and at the end, you'll certainly make the choice, right?

  1. Who do you love most: Many people believe that the core of relationship is aimed at a particular purpose. But this is far from the truth. The base of any relationship/marriage must be nothing but genuine love. Now, who do you truly love? Knowing this is simple; the person you love no matter what he/she possess is the right partner for you.
  2. Who loves you most This is matter of the mind, so forget about what others say or tell you. Who do you think really loves you? Who do you think loves you, not because of what you have, your background, your wealth, popularity, fame, but for who you are? In my book, 'How to make someone fall in love with you', I explained in details how making someone fall for you isn't all, but rather, cultivating genuine love for each other is what keeps the relationship going.
  3. In matters of responsibilities, which? In order to choose a partner between two lovers, you must look behind just the present but also in the future as well. Just predict, who is more responsible? If you had children today, which can take full responsibilities as true parent? If you were out of town, which can better take care of the family? If you get fired today, which of them can sustain? These are some of the qualities you should look in a partner (see the 7 qualities of a good partner).
  4. In matter of characters, which? In matter of characters, when choosing a life time partner, it's always wise to settle with someone who can easily tolerate CRITICISM, at the same time low in temper and above all, less troublesome. What do you expect a child to learn from a drunk parent or someone who spends most time out of home? The choice is easy to make, right?
  5. Look beyond his/her personalities: This is the point where most people usually get stuck at. When choosing a life time partner, they focus only on the individual thereby ignoring vital factors such as his/her background, parents' characters, family members, and the kind of people he/she associates with such as friends etc. According to researcher, Lazarus Puakonah, it's evident that these influential forces contribute to 23% of divorce. This equally means that you must choose someone who is well brought up in these aspects.

Final say on how to choose a partner between two lovers

As indicated above, you're the only one to make the choice among these lovers. The criteria listed above is just to help you somewhere along the line make the choice, right?

So, all you have to do is to take each of these points and try to see how or to what extent matches them and as soon as you do that, you'll certainly know, whom to choose and that's how you choose a life partner between two lovers.

Recommended books

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The book 'How to make someone fall in love with you' is without doubt the only book online that tackles the subject of falling in love. It's certainly going to double your chances of making him/her fall in love with you without doing much. The book is based on friendship psychology and the psychology of falling in love, yet simplified enough to be understood by just anyone. See details...

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