Personal Development for Astute People
Home Personal Development Why criticism hurts some people
Written by: Raymond Fohjem

Why criticism hurts some people

Why criticism hurts some people and not others

Have you ever wondered why someone may find a certain phrase critical while the other person beside doesn't get move at all? Why would someone feel criticized when the other person mean just something? I guess the most obvious question is; why does criticism hurt some people and not others?

Way back as a teenager I've always been a pillar of criticism among my friends and even some few dozens of people who neither know me nor have ever seen me before. Even now I get criticized sometimes by readers when I write something that doesn't resonate with their beliefs.

At times other bloggers write some hideous things about me which are distant from reality and try to stamp it on me (most are usually in congruent). These are some of the things that could pushed some people to their extent but I don't get moved. I don't even have to, because I tend to fathom the triggers behind these criticisms.

In most cases criticism hurts when people are unable to come to accurate understanding behind the meaning of people's say.

Why criticism hurts some people

  • Unable to interpret others: One reason why criticism hurts some people is because of wrong interpretations. Let's say a girl feels that certain guys believe she's unattractive, she's more likely to feel anxious whenever matters of looks occurs even if the subject doesn't concern her at all. Even if she didn't get something well she might feel it was intended to mock her presence. Do you think someone going criticism-free will get moved in this situation? Not even an inch!
  • Inferiority complex: People suffering from inferiority complex are five times more likely to attribute criticism to themselves. The reason they get self-criticized is because they tend to place their physical features first, even before trying to analyze the real message.
  • Self-doubts: Another reason why criticism hurts some people happens to be when they constantly live with false beliefs. Let's say three comedians got booed on stage, if the first person never liked his physical features he might believe it's because he wasn't good looking. If the second believe that he wasn't smart enough might go home attributing it to his low IQ. While if the last one was suffering from shyness might emerge with that conclusion. Even if they were booed for a complete different reason, their self-doubts make them believe so.
  • Alignment with emotional wounds: If you believe that you're not brilliant you'd likely feel the impact of criticism whenever someone says something related to that or when brilliant people are complemented. If you believe you're an introvert person you'd likely feel bad whenever you see other friends connecting with each other. This is because as humans, whenever something aligns with our emotional wounds we tend to get hurt.

Why criticism hurts

If you watch well you'll see that in most instances people feel criticized only when they harbor self-doubts, false impressions, false beliefs, and wrong interpretations of people's meanings.

The reason is because when we're fine about ourselves, we feel superior. I guess that's the reason why confident people rarely feel the impact of criticism because they believe in themselves first.

Recommended books

<<--Back to main category

Home     Testimonials     Contact     Books     Coaching     Hire me     About     Privacy policy     Your support